When an individual is chronically ill with cancer & they know they only have a few weeks to live, the doctors always warn the family of one thing:
"He or she will not be well, not at all, there will be days you'll think they're gone it's so bad. And then one day it's gonna be as if nothing happened, they'll be on top of the world, smiling, laughing, almost as if they were themselves again. This unfortunately is not a good sign.. It means that they only have a few days at most with you... I'm sorry"
A roller-coaster ride is the same; there are numerous ups & downs but the last climb leads to a steep & dangerous fall which then takes you back to the start line which is a flat top... Just like on those medical T.V shows when the patient is dead & the monitor beeps on a monotone ring whilst a constant red line makes its way through the screen.
Who would have thought I'd have gone through as much as I have in just over 2 months? Changing as a person, growing old friendships into everlasting brother & sister bonds, loosing someone I once thought cherished me as much as I cherished them and creating new friendships with people I never would have approached before but with who I cannot go through a normal day at school without...
I never imagined all of this would happen: during the summer I went through a lot of sad moments, I dreaded the day I could have to go back to school without Ayan, Stephane, Gervais, Lea & Roell, I couldn't picture how I was going to manage being at school without them because even at home, alone, during vacation, there was already a huge emptiness surrounding me... And then with that I still knew we were all going to be separated into different classes, it just seemed as if everything I once knew and loved was being pulled away from me. It didn't take long before I started scheming and putting together the perfect picture of the perfect year in my head: good grades, parties like before, loads of fun and love. I'm sure you've guessed that this imagined plan didn't exactly turn out that way, actually a lot happened that I never even put into account.
Yes, I've lost a friend. But I've made loads more, some I've known for a while but didn't know that well, some I met this year, and other friendships have deepened within the time of being together at school. What have I learned? Don't take whatever people give you, don't accept being treated like crap if you believe you're not worth it. Stand up for yourself no matter what! Stand by your morals & values!
That's the bad side of the coin..
The good side of all this drama? I'm happier than I've been in a damn long time! I've met people who have changed me, who have taught me different things and who are constantly listening to all of my drama even if it's stupid little things, to those people I would like to say thank you, because without those sms's or FB chats or even chats during Fashion Show rehearsals (tmtc Paloma ! ) I don't know where I'd be or how I would handle everything that's being going on...
Never look at one side of the coin, flip it over & you'll discover a whole new meaning of the lesson you were put through to lean. I think that's enough philosophical treatment for one article, till next time.. G xoxo
